Open Letter to People Who Found My Blog Accidentally

Inspired by Amy at Lucy’s Football, I looked at searches that led readers to this blog. And oh boy, I had no idea what you all were looking for! My blog doesn’t get nearly as much traffic as hers, so I pulled up everything from the life of this blog—say, this spring when I transitioned to WordPress:

chuck d’aprix montpelier resignation – Well, this was before my time at Montpelier Alive, so I don’t have much to say about this. I guess you didn’t find what you were looking for. This was the most searched-for phrase, so I take it folks want to know—send me info if you’ve got it.

sandman by geof Hewitt – I hope you actually got to come down to Montpelier to read the poem we posted in the window of a downtown storefront last year.

venture vermont 2013 – My competition must have been checking me out.

cleft hand – I have no idea what this is about, but holy heck, now I am inspired to write a cleft hand poem. Or have cleft hand nightmares. I was once obsessed with the words cleft, cloven, cleave, and all the forceful halvings this family of words implies. It’s all Li-Young Lee’s fault

kundiman, postcard poems – These lovely poems and this lovely project. Please save the post office so we can continue to mail poems on postcards to each other forever. If you still have poems to send, they go to: PO Box 1224, Montpelier, VT 05601.

opportunists paradise – I bet you weren’t looking for the article I wrote for the Burlington Free Press a few years back, but since it’s no longer online, I bet you also didn’t find it either. What were you looking for? Big Rock Candy Mountain?

chuck d’aprix – Still not here, folks. I barely knew the guy, but somehow the Internet keeps thinking he’s hiding out here.

phayvanh luekhamhan – There is someone out there who spelled my name correctly! Yay, you! I love you, let’s be friends for a long time.

this is my two weeks notice – Hey Mover & Shaker, I hope you went on to something better and more awesome from where you were when you searched for this. If I have any career advice, it’s that the Internet is full of standard copy for this sort of notice. I hope you did not crib notes from my cartoon. Do not use a cartoon as your two weeks’ notice. That’s my advice.

about a good deed done during my summer vacation – Great! Another writing prompt! What’s considered a good deed, though? Was this a writing prompt for you too? Or were you grounded and looking for ways to make up for your transgression during the summer? Was doing a good deed your punishment? Oh, summer. It is ripe for bad deeds. My assignment for you: write about the trouble that summer caused. Be the first to tell its secret.

“louder than a bomb”, documentary, -“slam online”, -tiga, -“public enemy”, -wbez – this was all one search item? I hope it brought you down to the Savoy in 2012 to watch this awesome documentary as part of PoemCity. Don’t take my word for it, take Roger’s.

montpelier new hampshire fiddleheads – Are you looking for a new species of fiddleheads? Or a recipe? My mother was an awesome forager and I remember “hunting” for fiddleheads while growing up, back when the woods were a short walk from home. Even in Vermont, development creeps in—aw, now I’m getting all nostalgic for Wilsons Woods, for Harrison Hill, and those other forested places we roamed. That’s another blog post. I bet you weren’t expecting to find these foam things.

career as paleontologist – Another bit of career advice: make your inner 9-year-old proud. Whatever you do. Don’t forget who you wanted to be.

venture vermont challenge – So I didn’t finish. I came close. But I had a few more points to gather, and I lost steam. Or summer’s fade funked me up and I gave in. All you winners, I’m proud of you. I wish I were you.

dinosaur digs mongolia 2013 – Hey, if you’re planning a trip, can I come along? Pretty please?

asian cicadas – [sic] Oh this classic research topic. I hope that you now know the going market price for American cicadas vs Thai cicadas, and that there is a black market for such in the world. Probably should bookmark that page for future reference.

phyllis greenway, artist, vt – Well, I hope you found her, got to meet her and buy some of her art! I honestly don’t remember why she was tagged, but it probably has something to do with Montpelier Art Walk.

chuck d’aprix montpellier resignation – Ok, stop it, seriously. I’ve got no news. And no news is good news, right? This is a good news blog.

sofia shatkivska sculpt cycle – I don’t think Sofia has a website. My post is probably the closest you’re going to get. Unless of course, you travel to Montpelier and see her work for yourself, which you should do.

food made from cicadas – I suppose you’d want to know this if you were looking for survival food. Mom’s recipe was not survival portion size unfortunately, so I hope you’re able to scale it to suit your needs. When I wrote this, I didn’t think that people would want to know how to eat cicadas. It was about recording a bit of cultural history. And search engine traffic. Guess it worked.

red bandana denim jacket decade – In my opinion, the “Red Bandana Denim Jacket Decade”  and the First Decade of MTV are synonymous because both brought Bruce Springsteen into my life, and for that I am ever grateful. MTV showed the world the potential of color TV. I can’t believe I’d ever been satisfied with Guiding Light in black and white.

burt porter vermont – Mine is the website you go to for working Vermont poets. Did I say that? Poets in Vermont get work? That’s right. Come to Vermont, write with us.

vermont nature journal 2013 – I never made that nature journal—I am so sorry to disappoint you! I bought the paints and everything. Too busy hiking and campfire cooking. But here. Here’s the only rendering I made this summer. Come again next year. I promise to have more.

Nature drawing

Instagrammed to boot.

comic two weeks notice  – Maybe you were looking for that Sandra Bullock movie, huh? I never saw it, but my friend Ray drew the storyboard for it. To repeat: do not use a cartoon as your two weeks’ notice.

paleontologist outfit – You follow me because I’m a fashionista. I knew it.

sofia shatkivska – I forgot to congratulate you on spelling her name correctly too—go, you!

2 – What sort of research paper is this for? The most natural number ever! I will write a blog post on the number two in the near future. In case it’s not too late, I want to contribute this to your annotated notes.

montpelier business association – You were searching for my MBA? You got it! Seriously, this great group of local business owners works hard to make downtown Montpelier awesome. They deserve their own blog post. Soon.

venture vermont outdoor challenge – Uncle! You win! I hope the Vermont State Parks run this promotion again next year, because I need to win it. Because apparently all you folks are looking to me to play. Because otherwise, why would you read this blog?

thatcher moats – The Thatch. Hadn’t thought about him in a while. Look for him in Hawai’i, folks.

ricker pond animals – If you’re looking for loons and coyotes, I’d suggest camp site 23 at Ricker Pond (or thereabouts). If you were more of a peeper person, I’d suggest the lean-tos on the other end of the park, Larkspur for example.

judy greenwald artist montpelier – Judy is another great artist that everyone should be buying from. Come down for Montpelier Art Walk one of these days and you’ll see!

hicken farm vermont – You probably didn’t get the story you were looking for. I’m sorry. I hope you got a great story nonetheless.

chuck+d’aprix washington dc – I’m going to start charging this guy every time someone looks for him here. Wait, maybe I should be paying him a finder’s fee. Got you here, didn’t he?

vermontoutdoorchallenge – Ok fine, I get the hint. You know what? I’m going to train during the off-season. Come next May, y’all better watch out!

kid paleontologist – Maybe the Kid President was recruiting for members of his cabinet?

site:.com/2011/ “comments(0)”  – No clue. Not going to try to find out.

vermont connection poem – Which one did you land on, I wonder? Since they are almost all written in Vermont, they all have some sort of connection.

advair poem – The poetry portion I get. I don’t know what the other one is about. ???

lao american summit – Hope you actually got to meet up with us in Minneapolis in 2010. No? Don’t worry, I think the organizers want to host another one sometime soon. I’ll keep you posted, I’m sure.

cora brooks poet – Yet another Vermont poet who does not have email. If you’re flying into BTV, make sure to stop by and view her permanent installation at the airport before leaving. It’ll blow your mind.

tamiko beyer – I’m good not only for Vermont poets either! If you have not looked for/bought/read her new book We Come Elemental, you are no longer allowed to read my blog. Stop.

phyllis poems bear pond books montpelier – A PoemCity connected search that I hope brought you down to one of the many author events we held last April. You really should be following www.poem-city.org. All future updates will be there.

carrie baker stahler – Not only just for poets! Friends and other awesome people too. Montpelier Alive’s Volunteer of the Year 2009 and marketing consultant extraordinaire. I usually don’t like to share, but in this case, I do not mind.

burt porter fiddle player in vt – I had no idea he played fiddle, too!

paleontology art – All art is science and all science art. You found out that I like to draw dinosaurs. But not as much as this guy.

kerrin mccadden poetry – Here’s my deal to you—I will write more about Kerrin if you want to know more about her. She is awesome and fabulous and my heart bursts when I read her work. Please promise to keep reading.

chi lam poet –chilam – This sweet and wonderful soul. I am so glad you found me via Chi. Thank you, thank you.

rebecca macijeski – Forgive me, Rebecca. I hope this search did you justice.

montpelier alive – You can also find us easily at 39 Main Street, Montpelier, VT 05601 or 802-223-9604.

mary elder jacobsen – Mary, please bring your son to PoemCity again this year—was so good to have him participating in our workshops. All the rest of you, please come too.

rolf parker houghton – President and Chief Instigator. I had no idea you were wanted.

shovelor on the roof book of poems – [sic] I am hoping for more of your readers to be following PoemCity.

lene gary montpelier – Who wouldn’t want to know about this lady? I am only sorry that I have not much more to offer.

——-

This little exercise told me a couple of things: there are some questions that will never get answered, but searches landing here will find something relevant. Even if my readership is small, at least they know that I have here useful and genuine information.

——

The other thing: I have to finish transitioning all those old photos to this new blog. Maybe by the end of the year, check back then.

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